First day of school

The first day of school is always awkward. Figuring out where your classes are, who you are going to eat lunch with, what to wear... the whole process is a breeding ground for mishaps and sad lunches eaten in a bathroom stall because your friends' lunch period is earlier than yours... 


My awkward story comes from my first day of graduate school, a setting in which I should be able to function as a grown up. I'm in graduate school for crying out loud!! This story also features a character I have lovingly named : Winky McGunslinger


My first day of grad school was a crazy one. I had to go to work super early in order to accommodate the 5pm friday night class. It was also ridiculously hot as I drugged around downtown louisville. My day was full of social working adventures [that's what I do for a living] and had been hectic all day. I helped a kid move into college. I put a deposit on a new apartment. I also ordered the wrong drink at Starbucks and stood in the store for 20 minutes while they said, "tall caramel macchiato" and me standing there thinking 'whoever ordered that drink needs to step up'.... oh wait, that was me.  


This hectic day led me having to run to class. And if you know me at all you know that I am not a... how to put this... 'delicate girl'. I'm not the girl who says ooo, it's a little warm, i'm glistening a little bit. No way. I sweat. My hair gets dripping wet and my face is so shiny it looks like saran wrap has been out over it. It also made me about 10 minutes late to the first. 


In come, running to class, breathing heavily and sweating like a drug mule at the airport. I sat down quickly and began writing down my introductory information on a note card, as the professor requested. As I wrote, drops of sweat fell off my face onto to my notecard. My professor then turns to me:


We are playing a get to know you game [inner monolouge: really? grad school get to know you game? great...] called two truths and a lie. You have to say three things about yourself, two of which are true and one of which is false. We as a class will try to guess which is false. You can go first.




I wiped the new forming sweat from my face and tried to think quickly. With no preparation, the best I could come up with is....
1) I had to run to class [hoping that people would understand the sweatiness this way and not think I was just really gross... I was regular gross]
2) Bacon is my favorite food [officially really gross]
3) I love public speaking. 


People instantly guessed number three and hallelujah, the spotlight was off me. I zoned out for a bit as I tried to get my breathing and my body temperature back to normal. Once I felt under control, I mentally rejoined the game. 


At this time, I noticed there were three men in my class. One was old, one was attractive but married and the third... well the third was young looking, cute, had tattoos, and no ring. Well well, class just got interesting. He went on to say his two truths and a lie, one of which was 'I've lived in Kentucky my whole life'. People in the class began debating this fact, thinking it was the lie. But from my angle, I could see that he had a tattoo of the state seal on his arm. I pointed this out to the class and he responded, 'nice observation.'


A normal, well adjusted, not psychotic adult would respond, 'thanks'. I did this part but I also added a wink.... while shooting him with my finger. 


I held up my finger in the shape of a gun, winked, and said 'thanks.'


Thus, Winky McGunslinger was born. And I left my mark as 'that weird girl' in my graduate class. Fantastic.